What if the angriest people you meet aren’t your enemies—but just overinflated blowfish? In this riveting and unexpectedly funny TEDx talk, veteran ER nurse and award-winning speaker Katelyn Carey unpacks the biology of rage and the hidden science of why telling someone to “calm down” never, ever works. With gripping stories and cutting-edge neuroscience, Katelyn shows how modern stress hijacks our ancient threat responses—and how understanding those responses can help us de-escalate even the most chaotic conversations. Her practical tools, or "brain hacks," help deflate tension, reduce conflict, and restore calm when it matters most. Katelyn Carey is a healthcare leader, national speaker, and the founder of “Beauty After Breast Cancer,” a trauma-informed resource offering hope and empowerment. If you’re tired of polarization and ready to connect through the chaos, this talk will leave you equipped, inspired, and newly curious. Katelyn Carey is an acute care nurse and crisis management specialist who uses humor and storytelling to explain how our brains process information differently under stress. Passionate about making science accessible, Katelyn turns complex concepts into practical tools and brain hacks to support high-stress interactions. She has designed and taught programs supporting caregivers, from community crisis nurseries to physician residency programs. As a speaker and author, the tools Katelyn has developed are used by healthcare organizations globally, helping professionals navigate the challenges of caregiving and crisis management. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx